Frenemies—they’re the perfect blend of love and hate.
Often a staple of the friends-to-lovers trope, or sometimes just that one character who’s gone from warm and fuzzy to annoyingly prickly. They’re as complicated for your protagonist to deal with as they are for your readers to understand.
The trick? Give them enough depth to hold their own subplot. When done right, the frenemy dynamic brings all the tension and chemistry that readers can’t get enough of. This week, let’s explore the different types of frenemies and what makes them so irresistible.
What is a Frenemies Trope?
The Frenemies trope in books revolves around characters who share a mix of rivalry and friendship. They might clash over goals, personalities, or unresolved past issues, yet they’re drawn to each other, whether by circumstance, mutual interests, or underlying affection. This trope often brings tension, witty banter, and emotional complexity, making it a popular choice in romance, young adult, and even fantasy genres. It adds depth to relationships, creating a love-hate dynamic that keeps readers hooked.
Key Elements
- Conflict and Rivalry: Frenemies often clash over personal differences, competition, or misunderstandings, creating tension and driving the plot forward.
- Underlying Connection: Despite their conflicts, there’s a bond—whether it’s shared history, mutual goals, or an undeniable chemistry—that keeps them interacting.
- Witty Banter: Sharp dialogue and playful teasing are hallmark features, showcasing their tension and mutual understanding.
- Emotional Push and Pull: The relationship oscillates between moments of conflict and vulnerability, adding depth and complexity.
- Growth and Resolution: Over time, the frenemy dynamic often leads to personal growth for both characters, resolving their issues or transitioning into a closer friendship—or even romance.
- Mutual Dependency: Circumstances often force frenemies to rely on each other, whether they’re working towards a common goal or navigating shared challenges.
4 Types of Frenemies in Books
#1: The Ex-BFF Frenemies
This one is multi-layered and has room to evolve over the course of the story. Maybe the characters used to be close but aren’t anymore due to a fallout.
You can tease this out when one character is clueless as to what happened between them to ruin their friendship. Or maybe it’s been such a long time that both have forgotten what they were even fighting about. Their conversations will be quick, stilted, and full of subtext. Weave in a good dose of arrogance into this for the antagonist, while making sure both characters remain somewhat likable. The key with frenemies is layers – just like onions and ogres.
#2: The Mutually Sarcastic Frenemies
These ones are basically best friends – but they’ll never admit it. Not even to themselves. Their entire relationship involves talking trash to each other. I’m talking petty insults, low-hanging fruit, and cruelty-made-passable by just a dash of good intentions.
Greetings like “what’s up, headass” or “shut up, loser” are commonly accepted and reciprocated. Think of this like a whole backwards language and culture. Failing to properly toss back an insult is the greatest diss you can imagine. Bonus points if you can work in some flirting; the mutually sarcastic frenemy can harbor some hot-and-heavy romantic potential if you’re game for it. And that brings me nicely to my next point, which is…
#3: The Hot-For-You Frenemies
Frenemies with a crush lingering just under the surface are fantastic because they’ll always want to hide it. Mortifying – truly. Maybe it’s a soft spot for the angsty janitor who flips them off but also keeps the vending machine stocked.
There are literally infinite opportunities to spark romance between two characters mortified at the prospect of romance with each other. Lip-lock: mandatory. One of my favorite ways to do this is to get them both stuck in a small, confined space. Then, sit back and let the sparks fly.
#4: The Do-Gooder Frenemies
Maybe when they’re not being a cocky son-of-a-you-know-what, they volunteer their free time for charity work. You can even have the opposing character stumble upon this fact at the height of their distaste. If even your most agitating character has a feasible backstory that offers an explanation, your readers will like them. But like your other characters, there’s a good chance they’ll never admit it.
What is So Fun About the Frenemies Trope?
We love reading about frenemies because their dynamic is layered, relatable, and full of tension that keeps us hooked.
- Tension and Drama: The constant push-and-pull between friendship and rivalry creates an emotional rollercoaster that’s exciting to follow.
- Complex Characters: Frenemy relationships often delve deep into the characters’ motivations, flaws, and growth, making them feel more real and multifaceted.
- Relatable Conflicts: Many of us have experienced complicated relationships in real life, so seeing characters navigate similar dynamics resonates on a personal level.
- Chemistry and Banter: Whether it’s a romantic frenemy or a platonic one, the sharp exchanges and fiery chemistry are endlessly entertaining.
Final Thoughts
As you can see, there are different ways to approach this unique dynamic.
On the broader scope of the idea, make sure you create an issue or breaking point that makes sense.
Make it deep-seated, complex, and emotional. This goes back to my original point about making everything nice and well-rounded. As long as your frenemy has more going on in their head besides hating your protagonist’s guts, they’ll add plenty to your story.
