One
Carlee
I couldn’t believe I was going to Oxford; I knew how hard it was to get in but here I was leaving in a few hours.
I checked my luggage a few times making sure I had everything, the only thing I wish I could pack was Holden.
Leaving him was the hardest part for me, I knew he was going to Penn state, and he would be the best college Goalie in the world. I knew he would be in the NHL one day.
I wish we weren’t going to be so far away from each other, but I had to break up with him. I couldn’t hold him back for 3 years.
I knew we would not see each other a whole lot and phone calls and facetime just wasn’t going to be enough.
“Carlee it's time to go” my dad yelled, and I sighed, this was it.
I came downstairs my dad grabbed my suitcase,
“Ready?” he asked
“I guess”
“This is your dream Carlee”
“I know but I am going to miss him so much”
“If you are truly meant to be together than waiting a few years won’t stop you from being with him again”
“Thanks dad”
Just as we climbed into the car, I noticed Holden pull up,
“I wanted to say goodbye” he said
I hugged him tight, trying to take in his scent and keep it with me always,
“I will wait for you Carlee” Holden said,
“No don’t I am not asking you to do that”
“It doesn’t matter I love you and I always will” he said kissing me with so much passion it made me feel weak.
I sighed as I let him go, he took off his sweater and gave it to me, I smiled putting it on and climbing into the car.
Driving away was probably the hardest thing I ever had to do.
At the airport I said goodbye to my father and went to my gate, my plane would be leaving soon.
I ended up wearing his hoodie, it smelled like him, and I was most likely going to be sleeping with this as it was all I had of him.
It is only 3 years Carlee you can get through this, you have too.
I would get my degree in Literature and then if Holden and I were meant to be we would find our way back to each other.
The plane ride for me was hard as I sat there broken hearted, I cried trying not to let anyone see.
Thankfully the man next to me didn’t care and he left me alone, I knew that I was going to be living in the dorms. I hoped my roommate wasn’t someone horrible and they just kept to themselves.
Either that or we became good friends, I mean they would be nothing like Layla, but I would try anyways.
I fell asleep on the plane and had a dream about Holden. He was with another girl, and they were about to get married.
I was in shock how could he move on so fast; I mean we just broke up a week ago, then I woke up and I was so glad it was a dream.
I know I told him to move on but to think of him being with another girl would hurt me more than I would ever care to admit.
It was a very long flight of me feeling sorry for myself and I needed to get out of this funk. I mean I was following my dream.
Ugh this was going to be so hard; it hasn’t even been more than 8 hours, and I missed him already. I had 3 more hours on this flight, and I needed to think of something other than him.
It was no use no matter how hard I tried, all I could think about was him, I felt like it was going to be a long 3 years.
The plane finally landed, and I climbed into a cab as it drove me to Oxford. I looked out the window England was a pretty cool place. I looked forward to exploring it and getting to know the city.
Once at the school I climbed out of the cab it was still early here, but I was going to get settled in the dorm first before doing anything.
I found out where my dorm was and made my way there, so far, I was alone, and I wondered if it was going to stay like this. I took the left side of the room and made myself at home, I texted my family and told them I was safe.
I thought about texting Holden too but then I decided not to, I need a clean slate, I knew Zach would tell him.
They had all summer together and I just prayed Zach didn’t ignore him, he needed a friend right now.
I needed one too, but I was alone, hopefully my roommate was not someone annoying. I felt like I would need someone who understood and could be there for me if I needed them.
I decided to go explore the school, and find out where my classes were, being her in the summer was amazing. It was so pretty here this school was insane.
My classes would start tomorrow, and I was excited to start, I wanted this more than anything. I wasn’t going to let my heart break keep me from enjoying my time here.
A few hours later I made it back to the dorm and there was a girl unpacking,
“Oh my goodness! HI "she said
“Hey”
“I am Emma”
“Hi Emma, I am Carlee”
“Wow you are so pretty” she said
“Thanks so are you” I said
“I feel like we are going to have so much fun together!”
“I agree, this is my first time in England”
“Oh, I grew up here, I will show you around, I can’t wait we are going to be the best of friends” she said.
So far, she was really excited, but I could see us being friends. I was glad she was from around here I could use a tour.
Emma and I just sat around talking for hours we were getting to know each other, and I told her all about Holden.
“I am sorry, but maybe he will wait for you?”
“I don’t expect him too, he will be a huge star, and I can’t stop girls from wanting him”
“True but he can, from the sounds of it Carlee, he loves you and I believe he will wait for you” she said.
“As badly as I want that I am not going to hold my breath, I told him to move on if he needed too”
“And what did he say?”
“He told me he would wait forever for me”
“There you have it, that boy will be there for you after you are done with school. I believe he will wait”
“Thanks that means a lot, but I know that I have 3 years here before I even think about seeing him again”
“Are you not going to go home for the holidays?”
“I am not sure it is a long flight and only a short amount of time, it is not worth it”
“Well, you can always come to my place, my parents always make way too much food!”
“Thanks Emma I think we are going to be great friends”
“Me too!”
We ended up going to bed shortly after the entire day seemed to go by in a blur, and I knew I had classes early tomorrow.
Before I knew it I was waking up to my alarm and a text from Holden
Goodnight beautiful, or in your case good morning. This has been a hard day, summer without you is going to suck. Call me anytime, I miss you
I sighed, I knew it was going to be hard especially the summer for him, he didn’t start school till September.
I couldn’t think about this right now as I needed to get ready for school, I managed to have just enough time to get a shower and do my hair.
I made it to my first class, and the teacher started the lecture. It was quick introductions and things started. We were already jumping into a novel, and I was excited that it was pride and prejudice. This was one of my favorite books.
The day went by quickly I had no time to think about anything but my classes. I had so much homework already, and it was only my first day.
I never did end up texting Holden back it was just too hard for me and I wanted to try and move on as badly as it hurt. Thinking about him was hard enough and I wanted to succeed here I need to not let my mind get the best of me.
